What Goes Around...

I had a brother, now deceased, who was a drug and alcohol abuser. It eventually killed him. When my brother was a young man he used to torment my father and mother with requests for money, a place to flop, pleas to bail him out of jail, you know, the usual stuff. My dad would agonize about what to do with these requests, but in the end he always rescued the jerk. Being a caring kind of guy myself, I advised my dad to just "screw him". Let him enjoy the fruits of his actions. My dad always told me that he couldn't do it. My dad never gave up on my brother right up until his death. No matter how big a mess my brother made, Dad was there to help pick up the pieces. I never understood why. The lovely Mrs. Sneed and I have 3 biological children. One of our boys has a doctorate, our daughter has a masters degree and is fininshing her second masters and our other son is a college student, despite have serious medical problems. We have been fortunate in that respect. They are what a parent hopes for, responsible adults leading their own lives. We also have an adopted son, our youngest, who has a "PhD in self-destruction." This finally brings me to my point. This guy badgers me relentlessly for money. He is unable to hold a job, he is an admitted drug abuser and is currently living on the street until he has to turn himself in next week to begin serving 30 days in jail. My problem is that he calls my cell phone everyday, comes to my office and generally makes a pest of himself in his quest for cash. He has learned to call from different numbers so that I don't know it is him calling. Mostly I don't give him anything but occassionally I do, $20 or $40, which is a mistake. Like my dad, I don't have what it takes to say no and stick to it, and my son knows this. Like most abusers my son has learned to exploit my humanity. He is like a predator culling the weak animal from the herd. He finds a weakness and moves in for the kill. It is my own fault because I give him hope. I vow not to give him money but I sometimes take the easy way out to make him go away for another day. I see what my dad was up against. Tag: Life