Sep 27, 2010

 My buddy Aiden goes to one of those year-around schools.  He is on a three-week break, so we spent the day together today.

He showed up this morning with a hangdog look about him and a stern-looking mother.  He got himself in some trouble at home.

Per Mom, the rules for today were;

1.  No TV
2.  No sweets
3.  No video games
4.  No fun grandfather/grandson outings.

Books and homework were okay, though.  As if.

This pretty much disarmed me of all my best grandparenting skills.  So we cleaned the garage, went to the hardware store and had lunch with my geezer friends.  A 2nd-grader's dream day.

Then, one of us took a nap, in ten minute segments, while the other guy thought of important things the napper needed to know immediately.

But, as it turns out, when you are forced to actually listen to a seven-year old, he can be kind of funny.

"Grandpa, will you play Yatzee on your iPad?  I'm not allowed to play, but I think I can watch."

I'm kind of sure the mom ban extends to watching someone else play a computer game.

"Grandpa, my dad got a new car, but I'm not supposed to tell you."

What kind of car?

"I can't tell you you have to guess."

I took ten guesses to get to BMW and another ten to get the color, silver, because. "I'm not allowed to tell you."

For some reason the misconception that I'm a cheapskate, buzz killer refuses to die.  So some people think I am better off being kept in the dark on the business of the family. 

"Grandpa, is this another one of your shortcuts?  We only have five minutes to get there."

This is rooted in another myth perpetuated by certain people.  Merle Wayne Sneed is a master of the shortcut, legendary.  If you need to get anywhere from anywhere in the shortest time possible, I'm your guy.  This super ability drives my detractors to, well, distraction.

But now, my favorite.

Knock, knock, knock at the bathroom door.


"What are you doing in there?"

"Using the bathroom, what do you think."

"You've been in there for five minutes."



Things in this blog represented to be fact, may or may not actually be true. The writer is frequently wrong, sometimes just full of it, but always judgmental and cranky


The Bug said...

I feel your pain - or actually it sounded like you enjoyed the day :) My dad has to keep my 8 year old niece a few days this week - now SHE is a piece of work LOL. And my dad is also someone to whom we reveal purchases cautiously - "oh, THIS old thing??"

Kurt said...

Sounds like a of of fun.

Perpetual Chocoholic said...

LOL! I now know where all the fire hydrants are in my neighbourhood but I'm no good at shortcuts. I guess we all have our specialties.

Barbara said...

Sounds like a fun day even though fun was prohibited. I'm sure he and his mother were glad to have some time apart.

I love shortcuts too, especially the ones where I get really lost and have to figure out a way to get back on track. I don't tell people about those very often.

Bella Rum said...

Hilarious... especially giving up the dope on the new car. That'll learn 'em not to restrict his activities.

Annie Ha said...

I really don't understand the whole year round school thing.

Steve Reed said...

Ha! My ears perk up the minute someone says "I'm not supposed to tell you."

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