Jan 8, 2009

A woman came into the store yesterday and asked me if we sold lead mesh. Lead mesh? She meant something like screening material, only made from lead. I explained that lead mesh would likely be illegal due to toxicity, but in any event we have none. We do sell aluminum screen, I offered. She wondered if aluminum would block out frequencies as well as lead does? You know, the frequencies that 'they' are using to mess with your mind and all? She said that she had heard that lead is what you really need. This became one of those moments when decent human beings sympathize with another who is clearly disturbed. I, on the other hand, summoned our store expert on unwanted radio transmissions, a guy named Bruce, who happened to be walking by. While poor Bruce got up to speed on insidious radio transmissions, I disappeared. Bruce, who is an intrepid fellow, told her that the assistant manager was our "go to" guy on this subject and called him to help. Then Bruce vamoosed. When I last saw the poor woman, she was holding about fifty sheets of sandpaper on her head, evidently testing their frequency-blocking power. I believe I read that 200 grit works best. Things in this blog represented to be fact, may or may not actually be true. The writer is frequently wrong, sometimes just full of it, but always judgmental and cranky

12 comments:

mouse (aka kimy) said...

I have long heard that aluminum foil has always foiled those pesky transmissions.

would sandpaper be a bit scratchy?

it clearly does take all kinds. wouldn't the world be a boring place otherwise!

Anonymous said...

Mel Gibson used aluminum foil.

Barbara said...

The old "pass 'em off to someone else" approach. Wouldn't it have been easier and quicker to just sell her the aluminum mesh from the get go, assuring her it would do the trick?! Did you at least tell her to get rid of the sandpaper immediately after its use to avoid contamination? :)

JennyHaha said...

Oh...mah...gosh...that is bizarre! Why do you get to have ALL the fun? ;D

Megan said...

You should have reminded her that lead is a banned substance since Superman can't see through it.

I can only imagine the heights the conversation might have reached after that.

Squirrel said...

There's a website for *AFDB's (Aluminum Foil Deflector beanies) next time the lady comes in give her this address:

http://zapatopi.net/afdb/


*still illegal to make and wear in Canada.

Annie Ha said...

This is hysterical.
Hysterical!

bella rum said...

Some of my relatives could have used some lead mesh. I'm just saying. Couldn't have hurt.

Reya Mellicker said...

Disturbing, isn't it, that so many of your readers know how to block transmissions from "them."

And people think I'm weird!

btw, the nutcases in DC also believe in aluminum foil.

Adrianne said...

So, I don't know if technically speaking it really "takes all kinds," as the old saying goes, but practically speaking I think that there *are* all kinds, and that fact tends to make life a whole lot more interesting than it would be otherwise. Perhaps a tad disturbing too, sometimes, but definitely never dull.

Steve said...

Aluminum foil is certainly what I thought of...heck, I saw "Signs"!

Kurt said...

Right. The government outlawed lead screens because of their "toxicity." Convenient.