Evening Update

I'm happy to report that at long last me and my $423.80 have been reunited. The bank bureaucrats fought to the end, but I out 'subborned' them. Before traipsing over to the credit union this morning I attempted to contact Andrea, the writer of the letter I received Saturday, which informed me that I was screwed. No dice on that, Andrea was unavailable all day. I did speak to someone else but she didn't seem to know anything about my problem. She promised to check it out and call me back when she knew more. That would likely be a week from never. After a while, I decided to go over to my branch and get a little huffy with them. I spent about fifteen minutes trying to explain the problem to a woman at the front desk. She in turn made about a half dozen phone calls trying to sort things out for me. As it turns out somewhere between the branch office and headquarters, they lost my paperwork, hence the letter from Andrea. They were able to verify that I had met their requirements from notes in my file, but the actual papers are misfiled or lost somewhere. Their solution was to make out a new set. This time I got to meet with the branch manager. She grilled me on the details, just in case I was going to crack and admit that I am a crook living in Maryland. Then, she had me sign the paperwork again. So far so good, but things took a turn for the worse. Me: So when do I get my money back? Her: After you wife comes in and signs too. For a moment I couldn't see because all the blood in my body raced to my eyeballs. Me: Why's that now? Her: They said so. Me: Who exactly are they? Her: Corporate. Me: Call them and tell them I said no. My wife didn't sign last time and she's not coming in to sign this time. Her: I can't help it, that's what they said. Me: Perhaps I should just drive over to Corporate and see them in person. Her: They are not a public office. At this point I dumped every gory detail of this debacle on her, including every time they could have prevented this mess and didn't. I don't remember it all, but I think global warming came in at the end. She left the room to 'talk to someone else'. She was back in a minute. Her: Okay, your wife doesn't have to come in, you can have her sign it and bring it back. Me: Nope. Besides, how will you know she actually signed it? Her: We will check her signature card. Me: You've had my money for almost three week and the last thing I going to do is jump through more hoops. I have other things to do. I'm not doing it. She left the room again. Her: Does your wife have a debit card for this account? (you think they would know this). Me: Nope. Her: Okay, she doesn't have to sign. Me: When do I get my money back? Her: Uh, by the end of business today? Me: Swell. And it is back, safe and sound. Yipee. In honor of the safe return of my cash, I offer you Peaches and Herb. Things in this blog represented to be fact, may or may not actually be true. The writer is frequently wrong, sometimes just full of it, but always judgmental and cranky