Aug 3, 2006
Ring, Ring, Ring.....
Warning: This post is not my usual inspiring stuff.
I fear that I am becoming too negative. Try as I might to be tolerant, things continue to get under my skin. Today it is cell phones. I am sick to death of cell phones, or more accurately, their inconsiderate owners.
I work in a 6-story building where the top three floors are occupied by call centers. As a result they are also occupied by swarms of 20-somethings. And not just any 20-somethings, these are the ones who are desperate enough to take a call center job. That right there eliminates them from Merle's "Sharpest knife in the drawer" contest.
I work on the third floor, just below this hoard and that means that if I don't take the stairs up and down, I get to ride the elevator with a bunch of jammering nitwits. Riding the elevator with them is like being in a mobile phone booth. There are times when 10 of them are in the elevator, all talking on their cell phones. It is like they installed a flipping elevator in the Tower of Babel.
The problem is that they can't receive or make personal calls during their shifts, so when they are cut loose for a break, out come the cells and let the dialouge begin. You know how smokers that have been confined in a non-smoking situation behave when they are released? This is the same scene. They hit the doors running cell phone pressed to their ear. Every conversation begins the same way. "Hey, wassup?". Evidently, in addition to failing to take advantage of the fine education my tax dollars offered them, they also failed to learn common courtsey. I really don't want to hear the intimate details of the life of a 20 year-old knucklehead, I really don't.
On the way home today I stopped at my credit union. Since it was pouring rain and this particular branch has no-drive up window, I went inside. There was this woman in line ahead of me having a very loud, very personal conversation on her cell phone. It was in what you would call her outside voice. I really don't want to hear the intimate details of the life of an overweight 40 year-old, I really don't.
So here are some tips for cell phone use, brought to you free and without commercial interruption by your pal Merle.
a. Don't talk to your friends or family while at a teller or a cashier. It is rude.
b. If you are talking about your private life move to a quiet place. If I wanted to be exposed to the Jerry Springer show I could TIVO it.
c. Don't have conversations on your phone in restaurants. I'm trying to eat in peace here.
d. Turn off the phone in the movie, the theater, a church, the doctor's office, etc.
e. If you need to talk while you drive, try to crash into a tree or a light pole, rather than me.
f. And for Pete's sake don't talk on the phone in a public bathroom. There is a screwball on my floor that walks in, pees, washes his hands and leaves without ever getting off his phone. One day I heard him yelling at his kid for not cleaning his room, while he was taking a whiz. Lyndon Johnson was famous for making his underlings follow him into the bathroom so that he could continue to talk to them while he answered nature's call. This fellow is no Lyndon Johnson.
The post office near my home put up a sign saying that if you come to the window talking on your phone you get no service. That is more like it.
In short, stop being a self-center jackass. Nothing in your life is of interest to me. That is all, dismissed.
Oh yeah, one more thing. If you have one of those blue tooth ear things...they look real stupid.
Merle
Things in this blog represented to be fact, may or may not actually be true. The writer is frequently wrong and sometimes just full of it.
Tag: Daily Life
Personal Finance
Humor
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2 comments:
I predict that, one day, someone will shush me in a public place because he is on his cell phone and I'm making noise, perhaps talking to a real person. It won't be pretty.
Like your blog - fact or not, I find it highly entertaining. And as for the cell phone comments we ( my work colleague with whom I shared your comments and myself) are right with your list. We both have cell phones but don't need them to control other people and vice-versa. Consequently we are often berated by others for not always carrying our phones and being at their constant beck and call. I think your local post office has the right idea!! As we live in another country - but we do know who Jerry Springer is - could we have a translation of TIVO? Censorship allowing of course.
Long live the Sneed blog!!
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